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Singularity (2017) Review

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Singularity

Singularity (2017) was written and directed by Robert Kouba. The movie starts out in 2020 with the launch of Kronos, an AI super computer that is supposed to solve everything. We get introduced to the main character Andrew Davis who is taking care of his mother. As Andrew goes to work, Kronos goes online and determines that man’s biggest problem is man and starts destroying mankind. We cut to 97 years later where Andrew wakes up unscathed and unaged as he climbs out of some hole and conveniently finds a brand new outfit. He also picks up a necklace that the film desperately wants you to know is important. This movie tries ineradicably hard to be symbolic.

We then get introduced to Katniss Croft, I mean Calia who is on her way to the last standing human city. She saves Andrew from a droid attack and they decide to go on this magical quest together. Of course, they fall in love because they both admire that they are each the leads of this movie. In the meantime, Elias, the creator of Kronos, watches the leads in hopes that they will lead him to the last city, so he can wipe out the last of humanity. Through this Elias we discover that Andrew is a robot disguised as a human. The rest of the film is the love story of the two leads as they try to survive a machine run planet, and the obvious plot of Andrew being more human than machine.

This movie has too many holes leaving the story incapable of holding up on its own. It is incredibly dull. There is no tension. In the scenes when the leads are being chased, I found myself dozing off because the terrible CGI took too long to render. This was a hard sit as there isn’t anything that holds your attention.

The acting is terrible. The scenes between the two leads are just awkward. They have absolutely no chemistry, so their romance is forced an unbelievable. Julian Schaffner’s performance is just so robotic. It would work if the plot didn’t rely on the fact that Andrew must be believable as a human, therefore, this performance only makes all his scenes awkward. Jeannine Wacker doesn’t do any better and her live performance just seems lazy and unconvincing. She is also the narrator, and although her voice acting parts do have a little more emotion, it is not a lot or enough. John Cusack sleep walked through this. If you are a Cusack fan, skip this one. He basically reads lines and makes silly faces.

The story is flawed and full of holes. There are scenes where they will go into houses that look like they have been abandoned for weeks, not the 97 years that they were supposed to be. Why does it take 97 years to destroy humanity? Why does she carry a crossbow? The film leaves you with too many questions.

There is a lot plot points that they add and they forget about so by the end of it, if you in fact make it to the end, will leave you confused. They have human tunnel dwellings, robot cities, human strong holds, some weird neckless, and none of it really matters because they never really explain it. Instead you get to follow the two leads who you don’t even believe that they like each other. The best part of the movie is that they had the balls to sequel bate. I think it is funny that someone believed that this, what ever this is, would merit a second part.

This movie is boring. The concept might be cool if executed better but at this point, go watch Terminator. This movie isn’t worth your time and I’ll honestly forget it by tomorrow. I’ll give this movie a 1 out 10. Skip it.

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Bright Review

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Bright is Netflix’s cop movie. Written by Max Landis and directed by David Ayer, is a buddy cop music with random magic bullshit.

The film starts off with pans of several different murals on police brutality, establishing itself instantly as having a political agenda. It then cuts to the main characters, Ward (played by Will Smith) and Nick (played by Joel Edgerton) who are polar opposites. This is a buddy cop movie after all. We get some scenes where Ward, and the rest of the police force, express their disapproval towards Nick because he is an Orc. If you haven’t noticed by this point that no one likes the Orcs, you haven’t been paying attention. The murals, the random scenes of police violence against Orcs, and the racial slurs specific for Orcs are a huge tip. This film will take every chance it gets to remind you that no one likes the Orcs.

As most buddy cop films go, Nick and Ward are stuck with each other. They are assigned to the one mission that changes their relationship forever. On this particular mission they stumble upon a Bright named Tikka. A bright is someone who can use magic, and most importantly, wield a magic wand. A wand can only be handled by a Bright and has infinite power. The rest of the movie is about the two cops trying to get the Tikka and wand to a safe place while they try desperately to survive. So think The Warriors but with magic bullshit.

My gripe with this movie is that there are so many useless scenes that could be cut out. The scenes with Ward’s family have no purpose but to take up time. The scene with his daughter is awkward and the sound was horrible and had no reason at being in the movie. The family disappears by the end of the movie and you forget Ward has a family. And of course, all the pointless scenes of police brutality, while some are necessary, there were a lot of random ones. They really want you to know that this is a movie about police brutality.

What makes this movie particularly hard to get into is that it expects the audience to know how the universe works. If you don’t have the slightest bit of knowledge about fantasy, you will be lost. Even if you have some exposure to fantasy you will find yourself lost as the film does a terrible job creating its own Universe. The fantasy element felt extremely forced because they kept making up fantastical elements as the film progressed and by the end of it, it created more questions than it answered.

I feel that the fantasy element was a cop out. A way they could address police brutality and racism without getting in trouble. As a film that starts off with a clear political agenda, this wasn’t a good move. It is a safe way to gloss over real controversial issues that should be addressed, but this isn’t the film that will start the appropriate conversations. In the end, it is about race but not really. And the police brutality and corruption scenes are done way better elsewhere.

Another issue this movie has is that it doesn’t have any tension. It keeps derailing the action and tension with magic bullshit and very vague world creation. You do not feel anxious for the main characters as they try to make it through the night that you feel in other movies of this genre. Instead what you get is very slow scenes that drag on way too long and the whole time I wish I was watching Dred.

The only saving grace was the banter the two cops shared. Will Smith has some great lines in this. Joel Edgerton does a good job as nick. But this is only temporary as this movie doesn’t merit a second watch. The third time around I was extremely bored, and the scenes stopped being funny.

You can probably skip this one. If you want to check it out, it’s not terrible. I did enjoy it the first time I watched it but it really doesn’t stay good. It tries too hard to be political that it distracts from the main plot and in the end it is too slow for the genre it tries to be. I’ll give it a 5 out of 10, which for my experience with Netflix originals is high.

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The Kissing Booth (2018) Review

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The Kissing Booth (2018) is a Netflix original, written and directed by Vince Marcello. The film is based on the novel Beth Reekles. The plot is about two teens that are best friends. It doesn’t get any deeper than that. The main characters, Elle and Lee, are born on the same day and they are best friends because their moms were best friends. Lee has a dreamy older brother, Noah, whose only characteristic is that he is dreamy. Since this is a high school drama, well prep school, of course the dorky main girl instantly falls in love with Noah. You can clearly tell from the opening montage that Elle’s love for Noah is merited by his good looks and…that’s about it. And there is something about rules Elle and Lee make up as kids. They have multiple rules that they quickly gloss over because they aren’t important, but the one they do constantly remind you is that Elle can’t go out with Noah.

The rest of the movie revolves around annoying high school drama, if you could call it that, and their genius plot to make money for the school by hosting a kissing booth. If you are wondering why the movie is named after this plot point, it doesn’t matter. As much as the movie attempts to help you make the connection and symbolism of the kissing booth, and they try way too hard, it doesn’t matter enough to name the movie after it. Maybe the book did a better job creating this connection, but for the plot, as generic as it is, it doesn’t matter.

So the main character Elle, who if you don’t hate her by minute 13 you will learn to, is tasked with organizing the kissing booth and even get Noah and the popular girls to participate. Then there is more high school stuff that doesn’t matter until finally the day of the fundraiser. The kissing booth is a success, maybe that is why it is the name sake? And Elle ends up kissing Noah without knowing. The rest of the movie becomes annoying couple stuff where the two try to keep their relationship a secret and you get to see their love grow as they just bang. It’s a generic high school drama, you know how it goes.

This film is dull. The main characters are such bad people that I stopped caring about them instantly. Noah is hyperbolically perfect to the point where he isn’t even real and this all feels like a dream of some awkward girl. But I’ll give them credit. The awkward scenes are extremely awkward. Other than that, it was too generic to hold your attention. They try to fake you out a couple times where you believe that the two best friends would end up together, and I would have probably like it better if they did because Lee was a little more real than his brother, but they don’t, and you end up hating yourself for sitting through so much of this film. At an hour in I couldn’t believe I had made it this far.

My favorite part of the film is the ending credit scenes. They had such confidence in their final product that they believed people would stay till the end. I only made it that far because I had to, and the credit scenes are awkward and unimportant. They aren’t even bloopers, it is just awkward scenes of the actors being “silly” and at that point I just turned it off.

This isn’t worth your time. The side characters are forgettable. The plot isn’t good. The acting is ok but the concept doesn’t help in the slightest. I didn’t care about this movie. Maybe it’s because I’m not the target audience but it did a poor job grabbing and holding my attention. Netflix needs to stop spreading itself so wide and focus on making more quality content, as of now it is becoming the “strait to VHS” bargain bin crap you skip at Walmart. I’d say skip this and watch something else. Final verdict: 3 out of 10.

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Captain Underpants: The First Epic Movie Review

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Captain Underpants was released 2017. It was written and directed by David Soren. The film is based on the graphic novels by Dav Pilkey. The plot follows the two main characters, Harold and Georg. The film starts out in the comic book the two friends have created. The film then reveals that they are the schools trouble makers. But the school is a bleak place and it seems Harold and George have taken it as their civic duty to to bring joy to the other students. We are also introduced to the principle of the school, Mr Krump, who like in any middle comedy of course is evil. Through their hijinks, Harold and George have clearly made an enemy of Mr. Krump. After a mandatory science fair, the two boys are caught on camera committing their latest prank, sabotaging the project of Melvin, the nerdy kid no one likes. This evidence gives Mr.Krump the power to separate the two boys. In their desperation to stay together, the boys devise a series of plans to prevent this devastating separation. In a final effort to prevent the dreaded signing of their fate, they use a hypnosis ring to turn Mr. Krump into the hero Captain Underpants. The rest of the movie follows the boys as they attempt to keep Captain underpants from causing too much havoc and finally leads them to fighting the main villain of the film, Professor Poopy pants.

If you are a fan of the graphic novel or have some exposure to the source material, you will probably enjoy this adaptation. They do a good job sticking to the source material and even include a scene with Flip-O-Rama. I myself haven’t touched the novels since my youth, but the sentiment was all there. If you are forced to watch this with your kids, I assure you will not have a terrible time.

The voice acting in this film is amazing. Kevin Heart, Ed Helms, and Thomas Middleditch do an amazing job as the main characters. In some kid movies, it is easy to get annoyed by the over the top voice acting but these actors did a great job voicing their perspective characters. The art was spectacular. The film will switch between different styles from CGI to hand drawn comics to puppets and it uses each style appropriately. The transitions between each style made sense and the attention to detail was amazing. I really enjoyed the hand drawn scenes where they gave the feel of the graphic novel.
As the plot goes, it follows the first book pretty closely, so if you have read the books, this is not something you are unfamiliar with. What I liked about this adaptation was how true it stayed with the feel of the graphic novel. Just like the graphic novel, the film goes meta and it constantly breaks the fourth wall to talk to the audience and explain certain plot points in way that worked well in line with the story. It also makes a ton of jokes about the education system that were a little easy, but I appreciated them non the less. Even the moments that are over the top, like when they discover they will be split up, works well with the tone of the film.

Overall, this is a cute film. While I wouldn’t call it a must see because I can see where some might not like, it is definitely not a chore to sit through. If you are looking for a film to watch with your kids, I strongly recommend this because it isn’t offensive or dumbed down as some kid films have a habit of being. It is definitely not annoying. If you don’t have kids and have Netflicks and need something for background noise, check it out. The voice actors are good enough where it wont be distracting.

Overall, I’d give this film a 7 out of 10 because I did zone out a bit and it isn’t engaging enough to recommend to an adult audience. It isn’t really worth seeing unless you are a fan of the graphic novels and want a bit of nostalgia. I liked it because of the connection it had with my child hood, but even then it did lose my attention at parts. So if you don’t have anything to do, or have a kid, check it out.

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Introduction

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My name is Jose Churape and I love watching movies. I will spend a whole day in my PJ’s watching all kinds of movies and feel no shame about it. The only annoying thing is that I love to talk about all the movies that I watch. I say annoying because there are friends who no longer watch movies with me becayse I always have something to say. Some say I over think things. So, in an effort to give them a break from my constant jabbering, I have decided to write all my thoughts here, on this blog, for all of you to see! Or no one. I just needed a healthier outlet for all of my ideas. I will try my best to post often reviews on all movies that I watch, new and old, and hopefully I am entertaining enough for one or two people to join me in a conversation about any movie. THANK YOU! and I hope you enjoy the ride.