Tag Archives: Movie review

Youtube Reviews – The Switch (2010)

This is a charming movie that you should check out if you haven’t done so already. It is heartwarming, light, and the cast is amazing. I recommend this movie for a date night or any other night.

My only real issue with this movie is how they blur the line between learned behaviors and genetic traits  that are passed down between parent and child. The movie hinges on the idea that the child in this movie inherits all of these quirks from a father he hasn’t ever met. It goes out of its way to suggest that there is this natural unbreakable attraction between biological family. It is almost a magnetic attraction that is bound by traits that should have been learned through experience and not genetics. That being said, you can learn to overlook this and enjoy it for the story it is. A story about a man who learns how to be a father and family that was always destined to be together. Watch it.

The Addams Family 2 (2021) – Review

This was a very bland movie. Writing this, I don’t really remember what the movie is about because it does so little to stand out or create any lasting presence. The movie tries so hard to be relevant and hip that at the time of this review, it has already become obsolete. This movie will not age well.

That being said, if you are forced to sit through this movie, you won’t hate it. It’s not a bad movie, but I wouldn’t recommend it over the first one because it isn’t as good.

The biggest issue with this movie is Snoop Dogg. He is in way too much of this movie and adds very little to the actual plot. He only exists to create references to Snoop Dogg the musician and has nothing to do with the Adams family. His character is the off-brand minion character no one asked for. His scenes in this movie kill any momentum the movie creates as it halts the film to show the audience how big of a pimp Snoop Dogg is. If you take out all of his scenes, you have a slightly better shorter movie.

This movie is a giant build up to a very disappointing Snoop Dogg music video. If you have kids that want to watch this, it’ll be fine. However, I suggest you try to convince them to watch the first one instead. Watch it if you must, the first one is still better.

Youtube Reviews: Bandslam (2009)

There isn’t too much to say about this movie.  It isn’t impressive and hasn’t aged very well. It isn’t bad, it’s just a another kids movie where the goal is to win the battle of the bands. If you’ve seen one, you’ve have seen them all. But don’t let that dissuade you, it is no where near being the worst movie on the platform.

This movie probably isn’t for the regular movie goer. It is good if you have kids.  The plot is simple, the characters are awkward but likable, and the some of the music is decent. Don’t worry, it doesn’t have any of that repetitive, torturous toddler music. The performances in this movie are also pretty solid. The main character really feels like this geeky kid who is passionate about music. The friend group in this movie feels like a real group of kids who are in a band together. If you have to watch this, you won’t want to kill yourself.
 

My only real issue with the  movie is that I never really got into Ska. There was a bit too much ska in this movie for my taste, but that in no way ruined my experience. I just wish it had more punk or even some of the emo stuff they tease you with.

Watch this movie this if you have nothing else to do. Throw it on if you have kids. Skip it if you hate ska.

Youtube Reviews: Bait Shop (2008)

This movie wasn’t bad, it was just boring. It is generic, lazy, and not really worth your time. This movie suffers a lot from its writing. The acting is fine and they try hard with the little they are given, but the jokes don’t really land and they try so hard to be funny that it leaves the movie feeling cartoonish.

This movie is a copy of these save the dying business comedies like Barbershop or Dodgeball, but it doesn’t have the charm that those movies have. Honestly, if you have seen one of these movies, you have seen them all.

Here is the plot: Man owns a failing business. Bills have been piling up for so long that they bank rightfully comes to take the failing business. There is a big evil corporation that comes to town who comes to take the business. There is a time limit and price tag to save the business. When hope seems lost, there is a contest with a prize that is conveniently the amount needed to save the business. For some reason, the leader of the successful business takes too much interest in this small failing business and also enters the contest to attempt to block the save. There is an embarrassing first encounter where the main character loses badly. He rallies and begins to win but there’s a fight between he and his friends. Some sabotage later the friends come back and work together on some rule bending technicality that wins them the contest, the town, and the girl. The Villain loses everything.

Honestly this movie, and movies like this wouldn’t work if the villain did nothing and waited for the failing business to fail a again. Despite the bait shop being the social hub for the community, the community is 4 people who don’t spend any money on bait.

If you like movies in this genre, I would suggest watching one of the better ones in the series. This one is incredibly generic and forgettable. It isn’t funny, entertaining, or worth your time.

Youtube Reviews: Nacho Libre (2006)

I will be upfront, I am a little biased when it comes to this movie because it played a big part in my teenage years. That being said, I urge you to watch this movie if you haven’t done so. This is a comedy that makes light of the mundane life in a sleepy village in Oaxaca. If you are looking for a loud and outrages comedy, this is not it. It is a quite ride where the guide is Jack Black and Jack Black came here to perform. I would argue that this is one of his best roles. He is charming, he is funny, and he brings in all the charisma this movie can hold within the limits of its run time. His performance alone should be enough to convince you to give this movie a chance.

If you have kids, this is an inoffensive movie to watch as a family. If you are bored and need something to watch, or re-watch, it’s free!

Youtube Reviews: School for Scoundrels (2006)

This is an odd one. Some of the jokes have not aged well, but it isn’t a terrible movie. I recommend it just for the performances. The conflict between Billy Bob Thorton and John Hader in this movie, although dumb as it is, is something you should not ignore. John Heder has this gift of portraying truly awkward characters. There are scenes in this movie that are incredibly awkward to watch. Billy Bob Thorton’s performance should not be overlooked either. He is able to be the perfect villain for this type of movie.

My only real issue with this movie is the love interest. Amanda only exists to be the prize and that is problematic. Her whole personality is boiled down to be the girl the rivals fight over. As a result she is inexplicably infatuated by a guy who up to the events of the movie has not left much of an impression. I think Sarah Silverman says it best when she compares continually compares him to a serial killer. But this movie really isn’t about her or her lack of personality and if you treat her like the object the film makes her to be, it shouldn’t be a problem. She doesn’t add anything to the plot except create a central conflict.

Overall, it’s not a waste of time. As cheesy as this movie is, I’d watch it just to see John Heder and Billy Bob Thorton perform.

Youtube Reviews: Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector

This movie was made at the height of Larry the Cable Guy’s popularity. If you have seen any of his work, you have seen all his work. He plays the same character, encounters the same obstacles, and learns the same lessons. The only difference in his roles are the skin that the movie takes. Whether he is a Tow Truck, a soldier, or a health inspector, Larry the Cable Guy is the good hearted redneck with a lot more to offer than meets the eye. As a result, his movies tend to be repetitive and I would argue boring. There is so much you can do with this character and they clearly ran out of ideas with this movie.

It’s not that this movie is bad, it’s just that it is boring. It is so dumbed down and easy that I would argue that it was created for a younger audience. Nothing really stands out in this movie and I for one was left unimpressed by everyone’s lack luster performance. It’s almost as if the cast knew that no one was going to see this movie. There really isn’t much I can say about this movie. I wouldn’t watch it unless you like his comedy and lots of gross out humor. If you are looking for a funny comedy to watch, go elsewhere.

YouTube Reviews: Big Mommas 3

This movie is free on YouTube, but I would stay away from this movie even if I were paid to watch it. The movie is unoriginal, unfunny, and extremely offensive. If you are fan of the series, I would ignore this one because whatever worked in the first two is absent in this one.

My biggest issue with this movie is how offensive it is. It is sexist and racist and there are parts in this movie that are disturbing because it is essentially about this creepy guy living with a bunch of unsuspecting girls. To make mater’s worse, Trent, the main character of this movie, is the most unlikable character I have seen in any movie. He is obnoxious, dumb, and probably the worst generic rapper I have ever heard. Let me break it down, the whole movie is a bunch of skits where they put these crossdressing men in awkward situations strung together by a crappy hip hop sound track and made to look like a hiest movie. Any conflict or danger is generated by the main character who is a complete bafoon and it is exhausting to watch him stumble through this movie.

I would skip this movie even if you like making fun of movies. I had to take multiple breaks because of how bad it was. The pay off isn’t worth it. Your time is too precious to waste it on this. Next.

Hell Fest (2018) – Review

I don’t know what I expected from this movie, but I was left utterly disappointed. I understand that I am not the target demographic, but I will still give my grumpy old man rant if you’ll allow it. This review does contain spoilers, but I am hopping that after reading this I can convince you to watch this.

The film starts in the past and a cheap jump scare.  Although it might be done to set the tone of the movie, it is out of place and doesn’t add to the overall narrative. The true start is with the introduction of the main character, Natalie. Natalie has flown back home for Halloween weekend to visit her best friend Brooke. It is in this introduction that you see Natalie has some deep seeded resentment towards Brooke’s roommate Taylor. It is never explored as to why Natalie doesn’t like Taylor; it is simply brushed off as one of her quirks. She has a lot of terrible quirks. She instantly forgets this resentment because in their next scene together they are the closest friends.

Through plot convenience, Brooke has scored VIP tickets for a pop-up Halloween amusement park. It is at the park that you meet the boyfriends. None of these characters are memorable and seem to be simple representations of what someone believes teens are. Most of their dialogue can be summarized with “yall gunna fuck!”. I know It is asking a lot for proper characters and character development from slasher film, but at least let me like the main characters. At this point you are 30 minutes into the movie and nothing of note has happened. A faceless killer joins the game and now the movie turns from an outing with friends to a night of survival. This is a shameless Halloween rip off, go watch that instead.

The main issue with this movie is that the concept doesn’t work. Everything is so busy that it there is no real tension. This lack of tension hurts is status as a slasher film. What is worse, most of the movie is just reaction shots as they make their way through the many haunted mazes. They aren’t even well done nor are they fun to watch. This makes up so much of the movie that I honestly would have forgotten about the killer if Natalie wasn’t constantly reminding me. The plot to this movie is so weak that it wouldn’t exist had Natalie been sensible and left the park. The killer gives her ample opportunity to leave, but this movie wouldn’t happen if Natalie was sensible. She chooses too late to call the police. If she honestly felt in danger and threatned, she could have left, called the police, asked for a refund and we wouldn’t have to sit through this.

This park is also the void of safety. I have been to enough festivals to understand that this was not a very well-run from how much effort was put into its production. Had this been some sketchy fair, these issues could be easily ignored. But this place looks expensive, and nothing this expensive should have this many safety violations. There are no safety measures put in place to get the people out safely during a crisis. There are no clear signs that point to a clear exit. There is no medical staff or tents. There is also only one security guard in this whole place. They don’t even turn on the lights when they close the park to help people safely evacuate. This park wouldn’t have been approved for the public. Ignoring all of that, this is a park that should have been shut down the first-time people were murdered there. I am confident there should have been enough buzz around to shut it down the second or third time this happened. At the very least, there should have been a lot more preventative measures.

The killer is also a huge problem. This is a killer that pops up when it is convenient. The rest of the time, you are watching a bunch of drunks running around an amusement park. When he does show up, he exhibits inhuman powers. He teleports to cut off the group. He is able to keep close with a group of drunk college kids at popular festival, even skipping lines to pop up when the script calls for him. Anyone who has gone to a popular festival can tell you how easily you can lose your group, but somehow he is able to cut them off at every single turn. He is even able to disappear to avoid capture. This wouldn’t be a problem if he wasn’t so massive and slow. Even with this mass, he has no presence in the movie. I’ll say it again, I completely forgot he was the villain because he barely does anything.

My biggest issue with the movie is Natalie. The film attempts to create a deep character, but she ends up just as shallow, forgettable, and annoying as her friends. They give her a love interest who she clearly has no chemistry with. They kill him off instantly and no one even knows that he is dead, making this death pointless. You can argue that his death was used so he can get the phone and track the teens through the park, but that is a dumb plot device because it stops working when they really need it. But, this relationship is a huge part of her character and seems to be the only thing defining her. Having a relationship with the opposite sex is not a character trait and I hate that this movie made it one. For once I want to see a movie where the female protagonist existence doesn’t revolve around being swooned. Because of this trait, you get to watch one the most boring dates ever.

It is on this bad date that they allude to her vague and sad back story. This sad story is forgotten almost instantly. This movie does that a lot. Why do all main characters in these movies always have a sad back story? Just once I would like to see a character who is happy with her life. Bad shit happens to happy people too. But then it wouldn’t be very Hollywood and this essay would be a lot shorter. In this case, it doesn’t add anything to her character. In fact, most character development is established through lazy exposition. If they wanted to give her a sad back story, they could have had her have an argument with one of her parents over the phone. After this phone call, they could have had one of her friends console her and establish depth in that conversation instead of randomly inserting it as dialogue. This would have shown the audience she has trouble at home but also show a deeper relationship between the group. But this isn’t a better movie and you just get this shallow copy of something you would rather be watching.

In closing, you should probably skip this one. There isn’t enough substance for a full movie, even if they try bait an entire series. I don’t see this movie aging well, nor do I see any of their sequels or prequels coming to theaters. It is not an original concept, nor is it a good execution of it.

Haunted Maze (2017) – Review

I won’t waste your time with the obvious. This movie is bad. The acting, the production, and the lack of story is all sloppily put together and falsely marketed as a movie. Don’t watch this movie, even if you like making fun of terrible movies, there is nothing here for you. Most of the time if you can’t hear what is going on, you can’t see. I found this movie accidentally thinking it was something else and I hate myself terribly for having to watched it.

Now I will dig a little deeper into why Haunted Maze doesn’t work. The protagonist, if you can call them that, are unlikable and have no presence in the movie. You are quickly introduced to the protagonist who’s only defining characteristic is that they are teens. At least, they are what the director thinks teens are. It is a really poor depiction and it doesn’t help that they all have the acting ability of cardboard. If you get passed the poor acting and terrible dialogue, they are all assholes. None of the protagonist are likable and I instantly wished for the killer to do the great service of erasing them from this movie. Horror movies need a least one good character. A relatable essence that people want to see succeed and survive. Here, you get a brief introduction to a group of friends who really shouldn’t be friends and I would argue that their toxic relationship is more dangerous than the killer clown.

Now the biggest issue with the movie is the villain of the film. It is clear early on that this was a film that started with a concept and a movie was made around it. Worse yet, it seems that the film is a collection of unrelated ideas put together without any clear goal or story in mind. There are too many plots in this movie and none of them are resolved. This also means that this movie doesn’t have a solid flow as it will jump from scene to scene hoping for connections that aren’t there. Worse yet, the plot points this movie feigns to have seem to be quirks that come across lame.

The biggest quirk in this movie is the villain. It is clear of the bat that the actor who plays the killer clown is trying his hardest. He easily delivers the best performance out of the whole cast by far. It is not good enough to merit the watch, but I will give him that credit. That said, this is the worst killer clown you can have chasing you. He fucking talks in rhyme. Why does he talk in rhyme? That is never addressed. In fact, none of his character is explained. There is no rhyme or reason why he has to be a clown when nothing in his past suggest this as a logical personality. He is a killer just because and that instantly makes him such a flat villain. A good villain needs to have a motive, goal, personality outside of just a quirk. There needs to be a reason for him to act the way he acts and him being a killer clown because it is a horror movie frankly isn’t enough. You get tired of this clown so quickly because he talks so much but never once explains why he is hunting teens.

Some might argue that the traumatic experience from his past is reason enough to create believable motive as well as form his personal identity, but this movie brushes past this explanation so quickly and makes such a wild leap to killer clown that it doesn’t work. Had they done like in the first Halloween movie and shown a traumatic childhood, events and actions that suggest that he was leading down the killer clown path, or even made his father a killer clown it would have given the clown a little more depth. I don’t use names because honestly, it is so generic of a concept it doesn’t matter. With out this basic level of character development, there is no reason to care about the villain. With out any motive, any depth, the villain isn’t memorable. Think about all your favorite villains. Even those in slashers extend more than just a quirk and blood-thirst. You work because you understand the motive, they have weight and feel real because they have flaws and goals.

This is too much thought and analysis for a movie that was done with way too little thought. Honestly, you won’t get passed the first five minutes because of how badly everything is done. I did it so you don’t have to. Skip it like your life depended on it!