The Siege of Robin Hood is a cheesy, low-budget fantasy movie you have not heard of for good reason. This film feels like a very well-funded LARP, unfortunately, it makes for a terrible movie.
The Sheriff Of Nottingham is a tyrant who rules the land cruelly. The citizens have had enough but are unable to break away from his rule. It is up to Robin Hood and his band of misfits to storm the castle and give the land its peace and freedom. Do they have what it takes, or will they be another failed rebellion?
This was exceptionally boring to watch. The costumes and the setting are the best things about this movie. They spent a lot of money on cool pieces of armor and weapons, but they ran out of money for the actors and sound. There are a couple of fun fights, but they are too few for this movie to be worth the trouble. Overall, this film’s greatest weakness lies in its actors. There are no actors in this movie, and a lot of this movie consists of a poorly written script performed terribly. Getting through this movie was hard work, work I hope you never have to do.
The biggest issue with this movie is its lack of urgency. Nothing in this movie matters because there isn’t a threat or challenge for Robin Hood and his gang. The henchmen will die at the mere sight of the group, and Robin Hood will ex Machina his way out of everything. The villain in this movie is horribly written. The Sheriff Of Nottingham is evil for the sake of being evil. He rapes and pillages because he has to be the bad guy and that’s boring. A good villain needs clear motivation with competent henchmen so that the hero’s struggle is exciting and fun to watch. There is no weight to this villain and I was left waiting for Robin Hood to awkwardly stroll to the final disappointing battle. It is a shame because there are a couple of well-choreographed fights that leave me more disappointed in this movie. Why couldn’t the movie be full of well-choreographed and fun fights if they were going to skimp on actors and narrative?
This movie is a complete waste of time. I like cheesy movies, but this takes it to an unwatchable level. If you like to watch bad movies to make fun of them, don’t bother with this one because it isn’t as fun as you might think. I don’t know who funded this LARP, but it wasn’t worth it. You aren’t the target audience.
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