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Movie Reviews

YouTube Movie Reviews: John Tucker Must Die (2006)

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This will be more of an analysis than a review. If you are interested in watching “John Tucker Must Die,” it is free on YouTube with ads. You can watch it on Amazon Prime with a subscription if you don’t want any ads. I have to say this movie still holds up. I recommend this movie to anyone, it is a solid comedy with a shady plot. The acting is solid and the soundtrack is phenomenal. I recommend this movie for the soundtrack alone. The plot is a bit problematic, but you can overlook its immorality. This isn’t a movie that should be taken seriously

That said, I am going to take this movie a little seriously. I have to respect this movie for addressing some serious themes, and it does well. The main focus of this movie is to tear down John Tucker, but there are moments in this movie that show that the kids aren’t okay. There is a lot of pressure from society that dictates how everyone should act. John, for example, is the stereotypical alpha jock. He is the best at basketball, he is popular, and he is a player. But that isn’t all John wants to be. Throughout his fake relationship with Kate, he will act out and try his hardest to win her over. Part of that is because it is expected of him, but the other part is because he believes he finds something in Kate that is outside of what is normal. With her, he doesn’t have the pressure he has with the rest of the school and he spends the whole movie accepting this fact. There are scenes in this movie where he is shown breaking down this persona he has created, and those moments give his character a level of complexity that I did not expect. Of course, any development that his character makes is thrown out by the end of the movie, but I don’t think John was ever supposed to be a sympathetic character.

Kate on the other hand has the opposite problem. She is invisible and longs to be noticed and have friends. She doesn’t feel the pressures of society because society doesn’t notice her. When she starts being part of a group and starts to get noticed, she finds that she begins to act in ways that go against her character. There are moments in this movie where she questions the morality of the plot, but she will overlook it because she likes fitting in for once. This movie does a pretty good job of showing how the desire to fit in changes people. These are issues that plagued our adolescence, a period in our lives where we were just trying to fit in and find out who we are as people. Maybe that is why this movie still holds up because these are issues that people still deal with.

This movie isn’t as deep as I make it out to be. It is silly, fun, and worth your time. There are worse ways to spend two hours. Best of all, it is free!

Watch It Here!
Movie Reviews, movies

YouTube Movie Reviews: Never Been Kissed (1999)

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This movie is free on YouTube. The quality is a bit questionable, I am not sure if it is an official copy, but it it isn’t terrible.

I want to say that I love this movie. Drew Barrymore is amazing and she proves why in this movie. A bit of warning, this movie can be hard to watch because of its cringy and awkward moments but I believe that is the charm.

My favorite part about this movie is the main character, Josie. She is awkward and quirky in a way that isn’t annoying. I love how she is constantly correcting people’s grammar. I also love that the focus isn’t on her finding true love but her journey of personal growth. The movie does a great job at telling her story effectively through a series of flashbacks interwoven with her re-experience of high school.

The awkward tone is a huge part of this movie. It is part of the charm this movie holds for me but I understand that it isn’t for everyone. Some parts are difficult to watch because of how cringy she plays it. If you don’t like Barrymore’s awkward and bumbling characters, then you won’t like this movie.

That said, it is free on YouTube. Check it out if you haven’t. Check it out if you have. Let me know what you think!

Watch it Here!
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YouTube Movie Reviews: Arthur and Merlin (2015)

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This movie is boring, don’t watch it. The acting is bad, the pacing is terrible, and the plot is generic and predictable.

What kills this movie for me is the pacing. It is slow; nothing ever happens. The only reason this movie is two hours long is that everyone talks so slowly. I don’t mind slow-paced movies when they are fun and interesting; this is neither.

There is no world-building. I can’t tell you where the story is set or what is going on because the storytelling is bad. I will forgive a lack of world-building if the action and the characters were interesting, but this isn’t the case here. Arthur is a generic noble action hero. Merlin is a weird cringy character. I think they wanted to make Merlin the comic relief, but none of his jokes are funny. The rest of the characters are forgettable. Even the villain fails to hold any weight in the narrative he is controlling. It is difficult to care about this movie when nobody on screen is interesting or unique.

The plot fairs even worse. Arthur and Merlin are on a journey to stop the evil wizard from summoning the ultimate evil. They blow through easy encounters and tell terrible jokes along the way. There is no urgency, despite the timer counting down. Nothing happens in this movie.

There is too much wrong with this movie for it to be worth your time. The fights are boring, the magic is inconsistent, and the pacing is horrible. Don’t watch this movie! Even if it is free, your time is better served elsewhere.

If you don’t believe me, you can watch it free on YouTube.

Watch it Here!
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YouTube Movie Reviews: My Boss’s Daughter (2007)

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There isn’t much to say about this movie, I was very unimpressed. Maybe the movie was funny when it came out, but it isn’t funny today. A lot of the humor in this movie relies on gross-out or body humor. There is no plot to this movie. At least not one that makes sense. The characters are running jokes and therefore forgotten. Each character might have a funny moment, but mostly they are just bland characters that exist to force the plot along.

Saying that this movie has a plot is a bit of a reach. Instead, this movie moves from gag to gag hoping that one of the jokes lands. Some of them do, but not enough to make this film a worthwhile experience. The unfunny jokes, the cringe-worthy scenes, and the shameless fan service make this movie feel longer than it is.

Don’t waste your time with this movie; it is boring. For those of you who don’t believe me, it’s free on YouTube.

Watch it Here!
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YouTube Movie Reviews: Chronicle (2012)

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If you are a fan of found footage movies, you will probably like Chronicle. The pacing is decent, and the idea is unique enough to keep things interesting. The biggest problem with this movie is the format. The camera work is shaky, but it won’t make you sick. There are random clips woven in that only pad the film but do little for the overall narrative. That is expected with movies of this genre.

Chronicle is a collection of video clips by a troubled teen and his friends who one day become telekinetic. It is a story about a troubled kid who wants to fit in as he deals with bullying and an abusive home. I believe it tells the story well. It does a good job of showing Andrew’s slow descent from humanity as he is consumed with rage.

This movie isn’t for everyone. The format is hard to overlook. If you do not like found footage movies, this movie won’t change your mind. There are clips in this film where the kids are obnoxious and annoying. Other clips slow down the pacing of this movie, but that is the norm for the genre. If you have nothing else to watch, this is a decent movie. You can do a lot worse for free. It’s not going to go on any lists, but it’s not a complete waste of 2 hours. Check it out on YouTube.

Watch it Here!
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YouTube Movie Reviews: Permanent (2017)

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This is a hard movie to recommend because of how niche the tone and pacing are. The pacing is slow, the characters are awkward, and the story is mundane. This is a very quiet movie about a group of awkward characters becoming comfortable with themselves. If you are a fan of Napoleon Dynamite, you will probably enjoy this movie. It has similar pacing and tone, although it is a bit tamer.

Permanent is a coming-of-age story about a young girl trying to fit in. As these movies go, she spends the whole movie figuring out where she fits in. There is a lot of emphasis on the mundane and weird aspects of life in a sleepy town somewhere in Virginia. I like the family dynamic that plays out on screen and the journey Aurelie goes on. The problem with this movie is the pacing, it can drag at points, but it is a pace fitting for the narrative.

This movie is a cute story about people overcoming their insecurities. The pacing and the subject aren’t for everyone. I recommend watching this in the background while you do chores or the like. You can do a lot worse for free. You can watch it on YouTube or Amazon with a Prime subscription.

Watch it Here!
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YouTube Movie Reviews: Tank Girl (1995)

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This movie is based on a comic, but I haven’t read the comic. Instead, I will focus my review on just the movie.

I really wanted to like this movie. The movie is weird, quirky, and it has a lot of energy. But, this hyperactive and weird movie gets old very fast. Unless you love this adaptation of the character, you won’t find much worth in this movie. The plot is lazy, the world-building is almost non-existent, and there is a lot of filler.

There are parts of this movie that I liked. Some of the costumes are neat. Some of the jokes made me laugh, but there isn’t enough here to make it recommendable.

My biggest issue with this movie was the main character, at least the unwavering focus the film has on her. Tank girl is loud, quirky, and full of energy. Whatever charm she establishes in the first few minutes wears off soon after. She gets a little annoying. The main focus of this movie is to show off how quirky Tank Girl is at the cost of valuable plot development and world-building. There are a lot of scenes where she is just posing off her wacky outfit and even a changing montage when she should be doing anything to move the plot forward. At its bones, this movie is very bare.

This movie is loud and flashy but very boring. I wanted a narrative, I wanted memorable characters, and I wanted substance; but I didn’t get any of that. Instead, I got the promise of a good time. It is free on YouTube, but don’t waste your time. Maybe read the comic instead.

Watch it Here!
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YouTube Movie Reviews: Minority Report (2002)

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Here is a classic I believe that everyone should watch. The movie is a crime action set in the future. There is suspense, drama, and some great performances. In this movie, they have created a way to see crimes before they occur. Tom Cruise is accused of a precrime and now races against the clock to clear his name. You get thrilling chase scenes, crazy suspense, and some pretty awesome betrayal.

Please note that this is an older movie, and the CGI has not aged very well. Although it is not unwatchable, some scenes look dated and ugly.

But the visuals should not be a deterrent; the story is amazing. I love the arguments this movie makes about free will. If the precogs can accurately see the future, then everything we do is predetermined. If everything is predetermined, then we have no free will. We are merely playing out our programming. It brings into question how many choices we as humans have when it comes to our lives. Can we change our destiny? You will have to watch and come to your conclusions.

Watch this movie! It still holds up. I have seen this movie multiple times and it is still an exciting experience. Best of all, you can watch it free on YouTube!

Watch it Here!
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YouTube Movie Reviews: Valentine: The Dark Avenger (2017)

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Here we have a low-budget action movie that isn’t worth your time, even for free. The acting is terrible, the action scenes are boring, and the plot doesn’t make sense. I can excuse the lack of plot and poor acting in action movies when the action is fun to watch, but it’s impossible here. The main character doesn’t know how to fight. The fight scenes are shot with multiple cuts and a shacky camera to hide this fact. There is an unfunny scene in this movie where they are looking through possible candidates for the role of Violet. They make a big deal about throwing out all the ugly ones even though they know how to fight. I take issue with this because why does it matter if they are ugly if the goal is to fight crime? I wish they would hire action stars based on ability rather than looks because the action would be fun to watch. But then it wouldn’t be marketable.

The movie takes place in a city plagued with crime. A man with a tragic past recruits a woman to be the hero the city needs. The movie would have ended a lot sooner if anyone had a gun. Instead, you get overacted long chase scenes, boring fight scenes, and useless exposition dumps. And when the twist comes, because there has to be a twist, it was obvious and unimpressive. I can’t recommend this movie, even if it is free. Spend your time and energy on better things.

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YouTube Movie Reviews: O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000)

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Set in Depression-Era America, it weaves in different iconic moments throughout the adventure. I can not speak for its historical accuracy, but it does seem to align with other narratives from the era. History aside, there is a lot to love about the movie. The characters in this movie are fun and memorable, but my favorite has to be George Clooney’s pseudointellectual adaptation of Ulysses. The story itself, although it is an odd one, is engaging. Watching Ullyses and company travel through the American landscape is a fun and beautiful journey.

This movie also has one of my favorite soundtracks. My love for folk music began with this movie. Folk music has played an important role in American culture. It is only fitting that it accompanies our narrative.

I could keep going about this movie because it is one of my favorites, but I will end it here. You need to watch this movie!

Watch it Here!