Tag Archives: love

Movie Review: At Midnight (2023)

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At Midnight is the cheesiest movie the cheesiest romcom that I have seen this year. The writing is bad, and the story is predictable, but it isn’t the worst movie I’ve seen all year. If you enjoy cheesy bad movies, this one is fun.

The movie is about a generic couple that can’t be together because of their social status. Sophie is a famous movie star stuck in a role she doesn’t want. Her life changes when she finds her boyfriend cheating on her, but because of her fame, Sophie must stay in this relationship. Alejandro is a hotel assistant manager who until he meets Sophie, doesn’t believe in love. A secret fling in paradise quickly turns into something more. It soon becomes impossible to keep their love a secret. But can their love survive the pressures that come with fame and status? Of course, it can! This is a cheesy rom-com.

At Midnight takes every chance it gets to namedrop the title, and it isn’t subtle. This obsession leads to my absolute favorite line of dialogue in this whole movie, and it goes like this:

After a few secret dates, the relationship between Sophie and Alejandro becomes more serious. They sneak away at midnight every chance they get just to share a few moments together. As they sit for a romantic movie date, the Paramount Pictures logo shines brightly against the camera so that the couple appears as simple silhouettes. Sophie turns to Alejandro, the logo still visible, and says “Midnight with you is my favorite hour.” Alejandro looks down at her and responds “Midnight isn’t a time. It is a place we can be together.” This is the best example of what kind of movie it is. It’s not a good one, but it is fun if you like to make fun of bad cheesy movies. 

The acting is the best part of this movie. Don’t get me wrong, no one is getting an award here, but I appreciate the energy put into the performances. The leads had decent chemistry, and it certainly has its moments. It doesn’t do enough to earn a recommendation, but I had enough fun with this movie that I didn’t mind watching it.

The movie is bilingual, and I have to say I preferred the Spanish bits. It felt like the cheesy telenovelas I used to watch with my grandma, but this movie required a lot less commitment. They aren’t a great example of Mexican cinema, but I found the plot threads a bit more interesting than the English bits. All the English plot lines involved the life of a fake actress and her struggle with identity, but none of that struggle was interesting. At least in Spanish, I got to hear people argue. 

This movie is lazy. The plot is very predictable as it follows the same generic plot common in the genre. They even dare to rip off the speech from Say Anything because they probably ran out of ideas. This is a movie riddled with holes and terrible lines, and it will try to distract you with shameless fan service. As much fun as I had with this film, it isn’t good. 

I have a soft spot for cheesy movies like this, so I enjoyed it more than I should have. You aren’t watching this movie unless you love this genre or love making fun of the bad ones. It is a lazy generic romcom with a pretty terrific cast. I didn’t mind that I watched it, but can’t recommend it. If you don’t believe me, check it out on Paramount+.

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Movie Review: You People (2023)

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I wasn’t a fan of You People because it is a lazy movie at its core. It has good actors who give fantastic performances, but this is a movie that sacrifices narrative in order to make its pretentious points about racism. If you are interested in watching this movie, you won’t hate it, but keep in mind that it isn’t the quirky rom-com that you think it is.

The story is about an interatrial couple and the struggles they face as their cultures clash. There is also a subplot about a podcast, but there really isn’t much more to this movie.

The acting is fine, but the leads share no chemistry. It feels as if the only reason the two are together is to create the uncomfortable situations the movie is brimming with. The white family will constantly make tone-deaf statements as they desperately attempt to not appear racist. The African-American family seems to be equally one note as they become the foils to the Jewish family. This back-and-forth gets old almost instantly, but I can’t deny that the performances were excellent.

This movie seems to be shamelessly made to make white people uncomfortable. While I appreciate some of the commentary it makes, the tone is directed toward a particular audience. I find it problematic to exclude a group of people from a conversation about racism. This movie also boils down such a complex issue into something too simple for cheap laughs. I felt like this movie doesn’t do anything other than try to make its audience uncomfortable. 

These uncomfortable moments and discussions are tied together by its poorly and barely existent plot. This relationship exists outside of various clashes and unintended racism which would be fine if this wasn’t a rom-com. If you take away these moments, you get a couple of montages and a crappy podcast. I was not a fan of the fact that I had to sit through a fake podcast full of bad takes because there wasn’t enough plot for a movie. I am very upset that this movie forgot it was a rom-com, but remembered the main character’s rise to a successful podcaster.

I can’t recommend this movie because there really isn’t much to it. While there are some great performances and some valid humor, it doesn’t do enough to earn a recommendation. There are older rom-coms that deal with the same subject but do it better, I recommend you watch those instead. I wouldn’t go out of my way to watch this movie, nor do intend on rewatching it, but you can stream it on Netflix if you have nothing better to do. 

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Movie Review: I Believe in Santa (2022)

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I am officially done with Christmas movies. I can’t sit through any more of these; I don’t have it in me. While this movie isn’t bad, it isn’t good either, and it isn’t going to be any better. I will try again next year, but I am not making any promises. I Believe in Santa may have its own charm, but I am tired and need to move on.

I believe in Santa is about a woman who doesn’t like Christmas and falls in love with the man who loves the holiday the most. I am not using any names because their only personality trait is whether or not they like Christmas. Aside from this difference, they are the perfect couple and will quickly fall in love during the course of the movie. The guy includes her in all his Christmas activities. She slowly learns to love Christmas, not because of Christmas magic, but because she loves him. It’s beyond cheesy. You have been warned.

I will no longer be doing Christmas movies because there is only so much that can be said about them. They are either cheesy in a way that is fun, so it doesn’t matter, or they are cheesy in a way that makes me hate Christmas. This one is fine, but I already forgot I watched it. The problem with these movies is that they are made to cash in on a holiday and often aren’t meant to leave a lasting impression. This one doesn’t, and I doubt any others will. I fear any further reviews on this genre will become echoes of my criticisms.

You can stream I Believe in Santa on Netflix if you need more Christmas movies to sit through. This is a great movie to throw on in the background because it doesn’t require any commitment. This movie makes good background noise, but you won’t hate the bits you accidentally sit through. This movie is dumb, predictable, and cheap, but I have sat through worse. I wouldn’t go out of my way to watch it, but it is there if you need it. Anyways, Happy Holidays, I am off for a much-needed pallet cleanser.

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Movie Review: Your Christmas or Mine? (2022)

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On the third day of my Christmas marathon, I finally found a good one. I started this venture assuming everything I watched till Christmas was going to be a disappointment, but then Your Christmas or Mine? came around and surprised me. While it is still your typical Christmas story, it is able to charm and entertain its audience. If you are searching for another movie to watch this holiday, consider this one.

Your Christmas or Mine? is the quirky story of a couple who end up attending the wrong Christmas. Hayley and James are heading home to spend Christmas apart. But right before the trains depart, they decide to board the opposite train. They plan to surprise one another at their final destination. But things don’t go as planned, and the couple is each stranded in a strange city with no way to get back. The two will spend time with each other’s family. James gets to spend his night with Hayley’s quirky family, while Haley is stuck with a grinch of a man. By the time Christmas comes around, the couple will grow more in love and full of Christmas spirit.

This is a cute movie because the actors have the charisma to make this movie work. At its core, this is still a cheesy Christmas movie, but one with enough charm where it doesn’t matter. Your Christmas or Mine? is quirky in a way that isn’t annoying, funny in a way that doesn’t try too hard, and better than the other movies in the genre I have had to sit through this year. It may not win awards or become engrained into the Christmas culture, but it will entertain.

Christmas is around the corner and if you need a movie to get you in the Christmas spirit, give this a chance. You can stream it on Amazon video if you have a prime membership.

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Movie Review: Something From Tiffany’s (2022)

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I have been avidly avoiding Christmas movies this season, not because I am a Grinch, but because I couldn’t muster the strength to sit through them. Let’s face it, this genre is the recycling of the same movie every year, and it is getting harder to sit through them. I decided that today I would start getting into the Christmas spirit, but unfortunately, the movie is Something From Tiffany’s. 

Something From Tiffany’s is the story of two lost souls who are stuck in their respective relationships. Fate brings these two unknowing souls together by way of New York City taxi. Ethan is at Tiffany’s buying his engagement ring when Rachel’s boyfriend comes in that same night to buy his girlfriend a cheap gift. In a brief moment, the boyfriend gets hit by the taxi, causing the events that will bring Ethan and Rachel together for Christmas. Ethen, being the generic and caring man that he is, rushes to check up on the generic boyfriend, but he ends up switching the ring with the cheap gift. Ethen and Rachel will meet in the hospital, and it is love at first sight. Fate keeps bringing them together, and in a matter of days, they fall madly in love with each other. You can guess what happens from here. 

This movie is bad even by the genre’s standards. The acting was surprisingly good, but its narrative is terrible. I always feel bad for the significant others in these movies who have the cruel fate of being love’s cruelest obstacle. Ethan’s girlfriend seemed like a nice girl whose only fault seemed to be that she wasn’t quirky enough. Ethan was ready to propose, but one brief encounter at the hospital was enough to change his mind. Rachel’s boyfriend was a loser, but at least he wasn’t evil which is refreshing.

The idea was to show how the leads were stagnating, stuck in their routines. It was only through finding true love that they can move forward and live their best lives. But is it love that they share? Is it fate bringing these two together? Is it Christmas magic? They are only together for a day before they decide that they are meant to be together. I see this as a relationship fueled more by desire than love. Rachel and Ethan lust for something different and fresh, and this accident gives them that. It is less romantic to think about how this race to fall in love for Christmas is less about fate and more about a change in scenery. Even if they were meant to be together and were previously in bad relationships, they were ready to be engaged, and that is where I have my problem.

I am overthinking a movie that had no effort put into it, but I was bored. Let me have this. There are better movies in this genre. Go watch something like The Princess Switch or Falling for Christmas instead. They are bad too, but somehow they are a little better.

You can stream this on Amazon, but I wouldn’t.

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Movie Review: Disenchanted (2022)

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Disenchanted is another lazy sequel from Disney that no one asked for. This lazy and uninspired kids’ film is a waste of time, don’t bother streaming it. If you are a fan of Enchanted, watch that instead. If you have to watch it with your kids, you’re going to be bored. 

Giselle is a Disney princess that has made a life for herself in the real world but finds difficulty adjusting. In an effort to have her happily ever after, the family moves out of the city and into a small town. The transition isn’t easy it puts a strain on the family, specifically on the relationship between Giselle and her stepdaughter. In her moment of desperation, Gisselle makes the wish that will change everything. Gizelle wishes for her stepdaughter to have the fairy tale life she deserves, but this wish comes with unintended consequences.

I already forgot I watched this movie because it is dull. This movie is lazy, and the plot has been done better elsewhere. This is the plot of all those slapstick babysitter movies that keep coming out, but a lot less funny and with a lot more singing. Giselle is nice and means well, but her moody teenage daughter doesn’t understand. It is by the end of the adventure that the daughter understands Giselle and learns to appreciate her as a mother. It is as cheesy and poorly written as you can imagine. 

Disenchanted does attempt to poke fun at the fairy tale genre but isn’t good at making its criticism. This movie is a collection of songs sloppily strung together with a poorly written narrative and terrible meta-jokes. I am glad that at least the singing was good. If no one is singing in this movie, nothing is happening. I hate musicals, but I found myself wishing for anyone to start to sing just for something to start happening. 

While the songs and singing are fine, I hope your kids don’t fall in love with Disenchanted. The endless loop of this movie will kill you. 

This movie is boring, and there is no getting around it. If you have to watch this with your kids, you will be bored. At least the singing is nice, and you won’t be confused with the plot, but these remain negligible consolations. You can stream it on Disney+, but I wouldn’t bother. 

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Series Review: The English (2022)

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The English is an Amazon original that left me feeling disappointed and a little bit offended. At its core, this is a white savior narrative disguised as something empowering.

Cornelia Locke has made it to America in search of the man responsible for her son’s death. Now she, with the help of a Pawnee Indian she meets along the way, scours the western frontier seeking her revenge. Can she survive the unforgiving landscape of the new world and find the man she’s looking for, or will the unforgiving plains claim another victim?

The show is an average western at best and very preachy. The acting is great, but the story and its pacing aren’t. The series jumps between different stories ineffectively, making this a disorienting experience. While I appreciate the attempt at a more complicated narrative, there is a lot of filler. This is a series that takes too long to get to the point.

The biggest issue I have with this series is how it tries to whitewash history. I was a bit disgusted by the lengths to which this series goes to prove that not all white people during this period were terrible. I don’t believe all white people are bad, I just don’t like how hard they try to prove this.

There is clearly a white savior complex and some virtue signaling at play in this series. You can see this with Cornelia and how she carries herself. Every episode has a moment where she has to talk about how brown people aren’t bad and that we should respect them as people. She has a whole speech about how white people are stealing from the Native Americans. It gets a little much, and I had trouble caring.

I get that Cornelia has a reason to be so kind, but this series goes above and beyond to prove that she isn’t racist. Other white characters in this series suffer from this same complex. Lately, I have been noticing many examples of modern media capitalizing on white guilt and virtue signaling. We don’t need this kind of whitewashing and hand-holding, especially when we are dealing with the terrible aspects of our history. Tell the stories how they are. They are meant to make us uncomfortable because they were uncomfortable stories.

I did not appreciate how this series presents the atrocities of this time as reactions from the good white characters. There is a problematic scene in this series where an entire Native village of Native Americans is slaughtered. You hear the slaughter in the distance, but the focus is on an English man and his overly dramatic anger. I am not saying they should have shown the slaughter, but this type of commentary is insulting. It was as if the series was saying, “we know this was bad, but there were good white people trying to stop this from happening too.” This shifts the focus from a terrible event and puts it on a white man. 

I might be taking things a bit too personally, but this theme was too present to ignore. The English isn’t a good redemption story because it is sloppy and lazy. It isn’t a good romance because there isn’t any chemistry, and the romance wasn’t set up properly. It isn’t even a good western because of how cartoonish it becomes. They have great actors who are wasted on such a mediocre story. I am sure there is an audience for this, but it wasn’t for me. I would recommend you skip it, but you can stream it on Amazon Video if you have a Prime membership.  

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Movie Review: Falling for Christmas (2022)

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You know what you are going to get with this movie. Falling for Christmas is as generic as its title. While it does nothing to differentiate itself from the clones released yearly, at least the acting is solid. If you like these cheesy Christmas movies, Falling for Christmas is a solid choice.

The movie is about a spoiled rich girl who has everything but finds herself lost and without purpose. This all changes when a freak accident causes her to fall down a mountain and forget who she is. Luckily, she falls into the hands of a struggling business owner with the kindest heart. Together they try to save the lodge, but they find something more meaningful than Sierra’s lost memories. They find love. This movie is as cheesy and predictable as you can imagine.

There isn’t much I can say about this movie because this movie comes out every year. This story doesn’t try to be original as it will hit every trope. You have the spoiled rich girl who can’t do anything for herself, a struggling kind man who is a dreamer trying to hold his family and his career together, dead moms, and a Christmas miracle.

There is an audience for this movie, but it isn’t me. I didn’t hate this movie, but it is not good. That said, Falling for Christmas is better than your average Hallmark. The acting is of a much higher caliber, but be mindful of the inconsistencies. Not everyone in this movie can act. It might not be the acting comeback for Lohan that we have been waiting for, but it is a nice taste of what hopefully is to come. The actors do their best with what they are given.

As far as love stories go, this one is very forced. The leads share little chemistry, but at least the acting is fine. Despite how lazy this movie might seem, it does try to tell a story. I liked that Sierra got her own arc, although it isn’t the most inventive.

Sierra starts out as someone who has everything handed to her. By the end of the story, she takes control of her own life. She makes her own choices and sets her own goals. I liked that she doesn’t accept the life she was given, or waits for a grand romantic gesture to realize who she wants to be. Her experience shows her who she wants to be and she starts working towards that. It is cheesy, but I appreciate the attempt. 

Falling for Christmas isn’t great, but it is better than some of its competition. I had a lot of fun laughing at how cringy it got, but never felt the need to quit it. It isn’t something I would go out of my way to watch, but it is there for when I need it. If you are a fan of the genre and love these cheesy Christmas movies, go stream them on Netflix. If not, then don’t bother.

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Movie Review: Amsterdam (2022)

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When I watched the trailer for Amsterdam, I believed it would be an okay movie. I figured it would be something you could throw on when you don’t really want to pay attention while being entertaining enough to pass the time. It has a solid cast, and it is based on a true story. I was wrong in my initial prediction because Amsterdam is a dull movie that you shouldn’t watch.

The movie is about three strangers who are brought together by war. They make a pact to always be there for each other. For a time, they live a happy fantasy in Amsterdam. Circumstance pulls them apart until the day fate reunites them in America. Burt and Harold are accused of a murder they didn’t commit. They must now come together and solve this crime or face false prosecution. Can they do it in time and save the country? Yes, they do. This movie is based on a true story. Read the wiki instead.

The movie didn’t leave an impression. I have already forgotten what this movie is about, and I sit here struggling to write a proper review. This film is a poorly told reimagining of a better story. Essentially, this film is a collection of people being quirky when they are supposed to be solving a murder. As a result, this movie lacks all urgency. The characters have a clear deadline, but they spend a lot of time fooling around. 

This isn’t a difficult mystery to solve. You will know who the bad guy is as soon as he walks into the scene. They don’t do a great job setting him up as a bad guy, leaving the big reveal at the end to be a huge disappointment. Without the urgency or suspense, there is nothing driving this movie. I couldn’t get invested because I knew everything would be okay in the end. 

My biggest issue with this movie is how it whitewashes the hardships African-Americans faced during this period. Any hardship that black characters face in this movie is always easily quelled by a convenient white savior. I don’t even want to get into the terrible and shameful virtue signaling that was a constant throughout this movie. This lack of real adversity leaves the audience with a weak story and an even weaker ending. The big moment when Harold and Valerie choose to be together knowing the dangers involved isn’t the powerful moment it should have been because there isn’t any tangible danger. I know they will be okay because everyone seems to be supportive and they will get the help they need to live together in peace. I didn’t care for this relationship because it was forced and pandering

Don’t waste your time on this movie, even if you can watch it for free. It isn’t worth it. 

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Movie Review: The Policeman (2022)

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The Policeman is a terrible movie. Do not watch it because it isn’t worth your time.

The Policeman is the story of a homosexual couple who must hide their love from the oppressive homophobic climate of Britain’s 1950s. At first, Tom and Patrick have a private affair, keeping their love a secret. Tom grows ambitious and realizes that the only way to get ahead in life is to have a wife. He marries Marion, but this façade quickly crumbles when Marion finds out the truth about Tom’s relationship with Patrick. Tom breaks up with Patrick and lives the rest of his life pretending to be heterosexual. The movie is about characters reflecting on their youth.

I had a lot of trouble writing up the synopsis for this movie because I lost interest several times. I had to rewind a lot because I kept getting lost, not because the plot was complicated, but because I was zoning out. This movie is boring, and nothing in this world can save it.

The acting in this movie is uninspired, and the characters lack the chemistry needed to make this love story work. They might be doing their best, but the script isn’t doing them any favors. It is no secret that Harry Styles isn’t an actor in any sense of the word, but he is not at fault for the quality of the narrative. None of the actors are. Harry Styles is merely the tool used to trick people into watching a movie they otherwise wouldn’t bother with.

The pacing is possibly the worst part of this movie. The plot moves slowly, and I suspect it is because there isn’t enough story for a full movie. As a result, we get a lot of filler in the form of slow takes, shameless fan service, and pointless shots of characters looking longingly out windows. If you cut out the sex scenes and condense the meaningful plot, this is maybe thirty minutes of content.

The Policeman is a poor representation of the struggles of the LGBTQ community. A lot of the hardships are glossed over quickly. The scenes of hardship and oppression seem to have been added almost as an afterthought. They don’t add anything of value to the plot except to briefly say how hard it was back then. It never feels like the characters are under any real pressure to keep their secret except for the fabricated kind designed to force the plot forward. And because the acting is so bad, none of the emotional moments hold the power needed to work. 

You can stream this movie on Amazon Prime with your membership, but I wouldn’t bother. I am tempted to cancel my subscription because of this experience. 

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