Tag Archives: Reviews

Series Review: The Pentaverate (2022)

October 27, 2022 josechurape Leave a comment

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Someone somewhere saw Love Guru and The Master of Disguise and decided that the world needed more of that. As a result, we were cursed with the most painfully unfunny series, The Pentaverate. The Pentaverate is a series full of bad puns, worse accents, and no jokes. Even if you like to make fun of bad tv, this series is a huge waste of time. Avoid it with your life. You have been warned.

The Pentaverate is a comedy series about a Canadian journalist who is searching for his next big story. His search leads him into the ranks of a secret organization that has tasked itself to help solve humanity’s biggest issues like hunger, illness, and global warming. What he stumbles into is more than he bargained for. There seems to be an ominous presence killing off members of the organization. Will he be able to get to the bottom of it, or will this be the end of the Pentaverate as we know it?

I hope this is the end of The Pentaverate because this series should not exist. This series is a collection of bad sketches connected together by a surprisingly nuanced narrative. As bad as this comedy is, there is an attempt at a narrative that I haven’t seen in other bad comedies. It might not be a good story, but it is a story and not a random collection of sketches.

None of the sketches in this series are worth your time. They go on for too long, and each one grows increasingly unfunny over time. Most of the humor in this series hinges on people speaking in skilly bad accents. They sprinkle a lot of bad puns and meta jokes in a desperate attempt to elicit a single chuckle from its audience, but all it achieves is the pity I feel for the people who had to sit through the filming. If this series is the best of what the script had to offer, I can only imagine how terrible the stuff that got cut out is. I pray to the gods we never get an extended cut.

If you were hoping that this would be the great comeback for Myers you were waiting for, it is not. If you are a fan of any of his earlier works, watch those instead. This is the worst collection of his comedy packaged as a series, and I hate whoever thought it was a good idea to print it. You can stream it on Netflix, but please don’t.

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Image by Michael Knoll from Pixabay

Movie Reviews

Movie Review: Beast (2022)

October 26, 2022 josechurape Leave a comment

Beast is so bad that not even Idris Elba can save it from mediocrity. If you get a chance to watch this for free, don’t. You have been warned.

Beast is a movie about a single father who takes his two daughters to Africa in an effort to bond with them and help them connect with their roots. But what they find isn’t the exotic adventure they were hoping for. A lion now hunts them relentlessly across the Sahara. Will they be able to make it out alive?

The best part of this movie is their attention to detail in first aid practices. Every time Idris Elba had to sew a wound or treat someone, he would make it a point to wash his hand and sterilize his equipment. I appreciated this attention to detail, but this small detail doesn’t make for an exciting thriller. This movie is so boring, that it makes basic hygiene exciting.

Pacing is a huge issue with this movie. The first 30 minutes are dedicated to family drama that doesn’t add anything to the story. I get that they are trying to establish pathos for the characters, but it is lazy. You learn that the mother died from cancer and the family hasn’t fully recovered and the dad struggles to forge a strong bond with his daughters. It’s been done before, and all it did is make me wish I was watching a better movie.

The lion is problematic because he has an ungodly omnipotence that should have been enough to make this a shorter movie. When the lion isn’t fighting the main characters, it is beyond calculated, trapping and killing relentlessly. With the family, however, there is restraint because the script is poorly written. The lion will always show up and the family will always escape, not based on instinct or luck, but because that is how it is written. As a result, the movie becomes insanely predictable.

This movie isn’t worth your time. The acting is mediocre at best, the writing is bad, and the action is poorly rendered. But for those who don’t believe me, you can stream it on Peacock.

Image By http://www.impawards.com/2022/beast_ver2.html, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=70658360

Series Reviews

Series Review: The Patient

October 25, 2022 josechurape Leave a comment

The final episode of The Patient just released and I can’t help but feel some disappointment. This series is too long for what it is, but it isn’t terrible.

Alan is a therapist who has been kidnapped and imprisoned by one of his patients, Sam. Sam is a serial killer who is desperate to cure himself of his wicked desires. He believes that Alan is the only person who can cure him. Through a series of sessions, Sam hopes to cure himself of his affliction. Will Alan be enough to help Sam, or will he be another of his victims?

First off, the acting is terrific. Steve Carell and Domhnall Gleeson are simply amazing. The chemistry between these two is the only reason I stayed with this show as long as I did. You won’t be disappointed by anyone’s performance in this series. That said, this series has an issue with its pacing. If you watch the series in a sitting or two, it is a bit more palatable as you can more effectively experience the nuances of narrative as they unfold. You get a fuller picture as you watch the growth of both characters under the circumstance, and it makes an okay story. It is still too long for its good, but it makes for a better experience.

Unfortunately, the series was released weekly, and as a result, the narrative felt fragmented. The episodes are short and often weren’t satisfying. There are a few episodes where not much happens, hurting audience retention. This series doesn’t have enough tangible excitement episode to episode that would convince a viewer to come back for more. Watching this series without such a big gap makes this less of an issue because you are getting a more complete narrative experience. Had they combined some episodes, made them longer, or even had it been a movie, it would have been a better experience.

The Patient sits in a weird space for me because while there are some impressive moments, it takes too long to make its point. I do like how they deal with mental illness and how they highlight the importance of mental health. I do love the characters and their motivations. What I don’t like is that it feels like they drag this series on too long for profit, and it hurts the narrative. The Patient isn’t a bad series, and if you need something to watch, it is defiantly an option, but be prepared to skip around a bit. I wouldn’t go out of my way to watch this, but you can stream the whole series on Hulu.

Image By FX / Hulu – Title card from episode, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=71849770

Movie Reviews

Movie Review: Pearl (2022)

October 24, 2022 josechurape Leave a comment

Pearl is the unnecessary prequel to the horror movie X. While I did enjoy it more than the original, it doesn’t add anything new to the narrative. Both of these movies seem to exist as separate stories in the same universe, so it doesn’t matter in which order you watch them. The only tangible connection between these movies is a few scattered references that aren’t very important to your understanding of the plot. These connections seemed more like Easter eggs than actual plot points.

Pearl is the story of a young and troubled farm girl with big dreams. Pearl wants to be a movie star so that others will love her, but she is bound by her duty to her family and farm and is incapable of pursuing her dreams. Trapped on this farm, Pearl becomes frustrated and angry that she can’t have the life she dreams about. The movie focuses on how Pearl deals with her frustrations and mounting anger.

Overall, this movie was okay. The acting is fantastic, the tone is fun, and the story is fine. Pearl is an interesting character, and Mia Goth carries this movie. There are some very intense scenes that are only possible because Goth is amazing. I love the quirky tone of the narrative. It creates a nice contrast to the dark themes this movie plays with, and it gives the film its unique flavor.

Pearl isn’t a bad origin story, there have been far worse attempts this year, but it wasn’t necessary. It doesn’t add anything to the universe. Watching them back to back made me appreciate Pearl a bit more because the story was better, but I don’t feel like I have more complete experience having watched both.

If you are looking for a horror movie to watch, Pearl is a solid choice. Pearl is a unique entry into the genre that you should at least watch for the experience. I wouldn’t go out of my way to watch it, it isn’t that special, but you won’t hate it if you do. I am glad I watched this movie, but I wouldn’t watch it again.

Image By http://www.impawards.com/2022/pearl_ver2.html, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=71716378

Movie Reviews

Movie Review: X (2022)

October 21, 2022 josechurape 2 Comments

X is a solid slasher film, but it didn’t leave much of an impression. It is a beautifully shot movie with a solid foundation, but it is a slow burn with little payoff. It certainly stands out amongst all the other horror I’ve watched this season. It’s a much better story than Halloween Ends. If you are looking for something to watch and don’t mind the nudity, X is a solid choice. I don’t regret watching this movie, but it isn’t something I will ever be revisiting.

X is about an overly ambitious porn producer and his dream to make the next big porno. He and his cast and crew head to a remote farm in Texas where they will film his first and greatest movie. Filming goes better than expected, but there is something sinister on the farm. Before they can finish their film, the crew begins to get hunted. Will they be able to make it out alive?

This movie is okay. There is enough good with it that you won’t hate it if you watch it. The acting is great, the visuals are fantastic, and the story is fine. The problem most viewers will have with this movie is you have to sit through an hour of people making a porno. It goes without saying, if you don’t like sex and nudity, do not watch this movie.

The movie is a solid addition to the horror genre. There is proper suspense, some creepy scenes, and some fun kills. The problem is that it takes too long to get to the horror. I get that they are trying to create deeper characters and a more meaningful narrative, but it takes away from the horror. Don’t get me wrong, I like that there is an attempt to give slasher movies a stronger narrative, but they haven’t figured out the perfect balance between murder and story. It is a great attempt, but it falls flat.

If you don’t mind the softcore porn and you are patient, sure, it’s something to watch. It clears a very low bar to be better than average. I wouldn’t go out of my way to watch it, but it’s fine if you want to kill some time.

Image: By http://www.impawards.com/2022/x_ver8.html, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=70038073

Uncategorized, video game reviews

40K Darktide Beta: Initial Thoughts

October 20, 2022 josechurape Leave a comment

If you like what I do and want to show your support, consider buying me a coffee!

Over the weekend, I got to play in the Warhammer 40k Darktide beta. I know I am a bit late with the coverage, but it is a game that I need to talk about. I had a lot of fun, and if you like 40k, this game should be on your radar. This isn’t going to be much of a review because I understand it is still in its early stages. This will be more of my initial thoughts about the game.

Darktide is the 40k themed Vermintide. Darktide is a horde survival game where you and a squad of 4 must complete missions and objectives while surviving hordes of enemies. The goal is to complete the missions without dying.

The beta lets you choose from four classes: the Psyker, the Sharpshooter, the Ogryin, and the Zealot. Each class has its own set of abilities, skills, and weapons. When you start the game, you create your character. You design their appearance, choose a back story, and a name. The backstory is more for flavor. It only seems to affect the color of the jumpsuit you wear. I played the Zealot and loved it dearly. Each class plays differently, and you should try them all.

The game felt very polished for a beta. The only issue I had was the long Queue at launch. I never encountered a queue after the fact. There were some minor crashes in between, but nothing that turned me off the game. The art style had that grimdark dirty feel that I love about 40k, and the voice acting was pretty good.

The combat was great. Shooting enemies with the bolter, closing gaps with my rush, stunning them with my grenade, and crushing skulls with my axe was just so satisfying that I am sitting here wishing I had more. There were only a few game modes and maps available for the beta, but the game got more fun as I learned the pathing. One issue I can see is that the grind can be repetitive, but I am sure the full release will have a more diverse gaming experience. There is some RNG involved in the form of weapon drops at the end of missions. I thought they were fair at the lower levels, but I can’t speak on the drop rate for the end-game content. There are cosmetics in this game. I didn’t get to play with that aspect of the game, but I can only hope it isn’t predatory.

As far as the community goes, i had a good experience. I never encountered any toxic players, but this might change at launch. There is a discord that is booming for those interested.

I had a lot of fun with this game. If you like 40k or these horde survival games, this should be on your radar. You can preorder it on steam and check out their website for more details. The game plans to release November 11, 2022.

Image By The box/cover art can or could be obtained from Fatshark/Games Workshop., Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=64640644

Movie Reviews

Movie Review: The School of Good and Evil (2022)

October 19, 2022 josechurape 3 Comments

The School of Good and Evil is a fun little fantasy that I am sure you will enjoy. While not without its flaws, it is a solid narrative. It is made for a younger audience, so expect a general cheesiness to its tone. This movie also leans heavily on its fairy tale tropes, so expect a sappy ending. That said, if you’re looking for something to watch, especially with your kids, try The School of Good and Evil.

The School of Good and Evil was established to create a balance between the two opposing forces. This school was designed to create the actors that would frame the many fairy tales we have come to know. The story is about two girls who are brought to this school from another world. As they struggle to adapt to the new roles they are given, evil lurks in the shadows. It is their destiny to change the world of good and evil presently, but will this change be their happily ever after?

I had a lot of fun with this movie. The acting is great, the action is fun, and it has a solid narrative. The movie attempts to challenge the traditional roles in fairy tales by having two headstrong and competent female leads challenging the system. It is nice that they aren’t perfect at first, but they do suddenly become perfect when the plot needs them to be. I also liked that the story focuses on their friendship, rather than having a prince give them meaning. It is a solid attempt at redefining the genre, but they could have pushed the boundaries further.

This movie is long, but it never felt like it. Every actor in this brought tremendous energy making this movie a fantastic experience. The villain is a bit one-dimensional, but there are enough characters to hate to keep the plot moving nicely. The movie gets a little preachy about the ideas of good and evil, but I kind of expected it from the general tone. Regardless of its flaws, it’s a solid fantasy movie.

This movie is what I believe the Descendants movies tried to be but failed to do so. If you are looking for a fun movie to watch with your family, this is a solid choice. It has action, adventure, and some pretty solid leads. Go stream it on Netflix.

Image Source: By http://www.impawards.com/2022/posters/school_for_good_and_evil_ver2.jpg, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=70959912

Series Reviews

Series Review: The Watcher (2022)

October 18, 2022 josechurape 4 Comments

The Watcher is a suspenseful drama full of fantastic actors that is fine at first, but it certainly overstays its welcome. I was fully invested for the first half of the series, but the show becomes tedious towards the end. It isn’t a bad show, and you won’t hate it if you sit through it, but it should have been shorter.

The Watcher is a series based on the real events of a family being sent threatening letters when they move to the suburbs of New Jersey. Strange things start to happen to the family as they attempt to settle into their new lives. There is an ominous force messing with the family. The family grows increasingly paranoid as they desperately try to determine the cause of the unexplainable events in the house. Will they ever find the cause of all this evil?

I have mixed feelings about this series because the pacing is terrible, and the ending is disappointing. I think Netflix was trying to drag this series out, as most streaming services do with their original content, to keep people watching. The slow pacing hurts the narrative, making it hard to recommend. There is too much build-up to an ending that doesn’t deliver a satisfying conclusion. The last two episodes are pointless and add little to the story. This series should need to be condensed to be a more effective narrative

Toward the end, the series gets repetitive. The couple will get a clue and follow the lead toward a big confrontation only to be proven wrong by a new lead. This keeps happening to the point where I grew tired of the couple and as a result, less sympathetic. The Watcher does a fantastic job at showing the growing obsession and paranoia in the family, but it does a terrible job unfolding its mystery. This puts me in a weird place because I love the initial presentation, but hate how diluted it becomes.

If you have nothing else to watch, this is a good choice. Just be aware of its faults. I wouldn’t go out of my way to watch it, but you can stream it on Netflix.

Image Source: By https://www.imdb.com/title/tt14852808/, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=72002569

video game reviews

Game Review: Warpips

October 18, 2022 josechurape 5 Comments

I was sent Warpips as a review code, and while I am grateful for the opportunity, I won’t let that sway my opinion. This will be an honest review of the game.

Warpips is a real-time strategy game that is similar to the mobile game Clash Royale. The game is available on pc and all major consoles. I played this game on the Nintendo Switch, so this review will be based on that experience.

Warpips is a 2D, card-based strategy game. You choose from a myriad of pips and traps to use against an oncoming enemy hoard. To win, you must destroy the enemy base before they destroy yours. This game has three game modes: Conquest, Quick Battle, and Endless. Conquest takes you through a campaign through different countries as you try to free them of their oil. Quick Battle is a random mode with three difficulties: Easy, Challenging, and Hard. You are given a random deck of pips and traps and try to defeat an enemy on a random map. Endless mode has you surviving an endless assault as you try to beat your previous high score.

The gameplay is very simple. You summon your pips and watch them fight against the enemy hoard. You can summon air strikes, use tools, and set up traps to help your pips secure their victory. In conquest mode, you can purchase additional cards and upgrades with the currency you earn while playing. There is some RNG, but I always thought it was fair.

Don’t let this game’s cuteness deceive you, you will need to be strategic with your choices. I played on easy and still found enough of a challenge to keep me engaged. If I wasn’t paying attention or was too conservative with my choices, I was easily overwhelmed by the enemy AI. I suggest playing this game on the harder difficulties for a more fulfilling experience.

This game ran smoothly most of the time, but I did notice the occasional stutter. The game would freeze for a second before resuming. It never crashed on me or affected my game, but it is something to keep in mind. I didn’t notice much of a difference between docked and handheld mode, but I preferred handheld mode because of its versatility.

The gameplay is a bit repetitive, but it might be a symptom of having it on the easiest difficulty. I played on higher difficulties, but I was never smart enough to get by. This game is deceptively unforgiving. Most of the game however is the same, and you find yourself constantly waiting for cooldowns.

I liked this game a lot, and I’d recommend it if it were cheaper. I am not a huge RTS fan, but this was a manageable game for my skill level. I thought the pixel art was a fantastic choice, and it definitely made losing sting less. The music is pretty fantastic as well. I recommend playing with the sound out, at least for the first hour or so. Warpips is a game you pick up when you want to chill but still need a challenge. This is a game where you don’t need to be too invested in a story or mechanics, but you will need to be strategic. I personally wouldn’t spend $20 on it and would wait for a sale, but I can see this being worth it to someone who really loves the genre.

Check it out on Steam, Nintendo, Xbox, and Playstation.

Movie Reviews

Movie Review: The Curse of Bridge Hollow (2022)

October 17, 2022 josechurape 4 Comments

The Curse of Bridge Hollow might be one of the most unfunny and stiff horror comedies I have seen this year. It is very forgettable. If this movie comes up as a recommendation, ignore it.

Another generic family moves to a new city to start a new life, but the house they move into is shrouded with mystery and ominous energy. Their lives change when the generic daughter character unleashes a curse on the city that brings all the Halloween decorations to life. She and her daughter must free the town of this curse before it unleashes a great evil into the world. But before they can deal with the curse, they must first fix their relationship. Can they do so before midnight on Halloween?

The Curse on Bridge Hollow is poorly written and acted waste of time. There is no chemistry between the leads, and it makes all the banter and dialogue painful to get through. A movie like this that focuses so much on intrapersonal conflicts needs better leads with better chemistry. Everything about this movie is stiff, and as a result, none of the jokes, one-liners, or emotional moments work. There is no reason to watch this movie, even if you like making fun of bad movies.

The plot of this story is basic at best. You’ve seen this story play out better anywhere else, but this story is beyond redundant as it follows a tiring formula. The daughter and father would go to the next scene, they would have an argument about how controlling the father is only to be interrupted by the animated decorations. The father begins to see that his daughter is competent, they have a small emotional moment and move to the next scene to do it all again. The only difference between the scenes is the terrible jokes and the poorly delivered one-liners for each situation.

I don’t think they had enough ideas for this movie because there is a bit of filler. There is a painfully unfunny recurring bit about the mom’s terrible baking. The mom would push her vegan goods on people only to have them reject them out of disgust. This plot point came back so often that I thought it was going to be the ex-Machina that would save the world from the curse, thankfully, it wasn’t. Although now thinking about it, it would make for a much better conclusion. Unfortunately, this joke was the best attempt at storytelling this movie has. This unfunny baking bit is the only plot point that gets a proper conclusion.

It took several sittings to get through this movie because it was so boring. This season hasn’t been good for Halloween movies, and I can only hope there is some hidden gem on the horizon. Until then, I will keep sifting the genre in hopes of finding anything worth watching. Until then, skip this movie. But if you don’t believe me, you can stream this on Netflix.

Image by HANSUAN FABREGAS from Pixabay

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Tag Archives: Reviews

Series Review: The Pentaverate (2022)

Movie Review: Beast (2022)

Series Review: The Patient

Movie Review: Pearl (2022)

Movie Review: X (2022)

40K Darktide Beta: Initial Thoughts

Movie Review: The School of Good and Evil (2022)

Series Review: The Watcher (2022)

Game Review: Warpips

Movie Review: The Curse of Bridge Hollow (2022)

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