Tag Archives: film reviews

Movie Review: The Count of Monte Cristo (2002)

I love the novel this movie is adapted from. I rank it among one my favorite books and recommend it to anyone looking for a new book to read. Although the movie isn’t completely true to the novel, it is a fantastic adaptation that you must watch. I do hold the novel a bit more favorably, but this fact didn’t ruin my experience. I had a blast with this movie, and I believe you will too.

The Count of Monte Christo is a fantastic movie about revenge. It has some fantastic acting and a great narrative. It is easy to get immersed into the period’s politics and revenge plot because the characters are so well done. If you love period movies, this is easily a great staple of the genre.

Dante is a fantastic hero to root for. He is charismatic, intelligent, capable, and well deserving of his revenge. Although the ending is a bit on the fairytale side, it makes for a satisfying journey. This story has it all: romance, sword fights, betrayal, and revenge. What more can you ask for in a film?

The Count of Monte Cristo is a timeless narrative that continues to prove it will continue to be so. Best of all, you can watch it for free on YouTube!

TV Movie Review: Journey to the Center of the Earth (2008)

Journey to the Center of the Earth is a delightful explorer movie that should be a part of your never-ending backlog of movies you still need to watch. To clarify, this review is about the made-for-TV version, not the theatrical one starring Brendan Frasier.

As expected of any made-for-TV adaptation, this movie is a cheesy and low-budget retelling of a book of the same name. While I do not know how true this adaptation is to the book, it is an adaptation I very much enjoyed. Full disclosure, I have not seen the theatrical version, and I can’t make the comparison. That said, this film is proof that a movie doesn’t require a huge budget, fancy computer graphics, or big named actors to have a compelling story. While it may not be Indiana Jones, it nuzzles itself neatly into its charming place in the genre.

Professor Jonathan Brook has been hired by an heiress to find her lost husband Edward. With the help of a local Russian settler, his nephew, and the heiress, Jonathan must comb the Alaskan wilderness for Edward. What they find in Alaska is greater than the mere fate of a long-lost Edward.

I loved this movie, but this movie isn’t perfect. You can tell the actors are trying their hardest to do period-appropriate accents, some of the action is stiff and awkward, and the graphics are terrible, but that is part of the charm. All things considered, it can tell a compelling and interesting narrative. 

The only real issue I had with this movie was how they treated the natives. It is unavoidable for movies, especially older ones, to have problematic representations of minorities. It isn’t bad enough that I would discourage people from watching this movie, but it is an issue nonetheless. 

This is a pretty great way to spend two hours, especially if you love cheesy movies. You can watch this movie for free on YouTube. You can do a lot worse for free. 

Movie Review: The Illusionist (2006)

I thought this movie was fine. The acting is fantastic, but the story isn’t something that excites me. It isn’t bad, but it is what you would expect from any other period romance movie, except this one comes with a twist. If you like period movies, this is a solid one with great actors. If you don’t, it is a little slow and you might lose interest, especially if you figure out the twist ahead of time.

The Illusionist is about a magician who falls in love with a duchess. Their love is forbidden, but they want to be together. He is a skilled magician and his performances garnish a massive following. Does he do real magic or is it all smoke and mirrors? Will they end up together in the end? You will have to watch to find out.

This is a low-budget movie. There are a few scenes where you can clearly tell there wasn’t enough funding, like with the sound, the special effects, and the scenery. But this humbly put-together movie is well done for what it is. It doesn’t need a bigger budget to make this movie better because its greatest assets are its actors. The biggest draw to this movie is the acting. Paul Giamatti easily gives this movie its life, but the rest of the cast isn’t far behind. I wouldn’t go out of my way to watch this film, but believe me when I say, there are worst ways to spend two hours.

You can watch this movie for free on YouTube. You can do a lot worse for free.

Movie Reviews: Legally Blondes (2009)

I did not hate this movie as much as I thought I would. Usually, when it comes to sequels, a series loses its magic around the third entry. This is especially true when there is a change in the casting, like there is in this movie. By the third movie, a series becomes a shameless and poorly executed cash grab. I’m looking at you Big Momma’s House 3I didn’t feel that way about this movie however. While this movie isn’t perfect, it is competently made, and not a bad way to spend two hours. I wouldn’t go out of my way to watch it, but you won’t hate that you did.  

This movie focuses on Elle’s twin cousins who move from England to attend a prestigious private high school in Malibu. The local mean girl has taken it upon herself to get rid of the twins in order to hold her reign over the school. This movie is very tweeny, so keep that in mind if you are considering this movie. A lot of this plot is a regurgitation of the original, but translated to a modern high school setting. It hits a lot of the important story beats from the original, but with a much less serious tone. It is really well done for what it is, but it makes it also means that this movie isn’t for everyone. If you are in the target demographic, you might have a lot more fun with this movie.   

Obviously this movie won’t win any awards, but that doesn’t mean it is terrible. For the most part, the translation was properly done. The protagonists were fine, the acting was decent, and the villain was cartoonish but fun. The fact that this was set as a high school drama is limiting for the story, but it is entertaining enough. There are some cringey and sappy elements to this movie, but it fits the tone of the movie.  While it doesn’t capture the magic that Legally Blonde had, it is a nice attempt.  

This movie is fine for a third, but it is made for a certain audience. If you have to watch this with your kids, you won’t hate it. You can watch it for free on YouTube. Trust me, you can do a lot worse for free.  

Movie Review: Belle (2022)

There have been a few attempts at adapting the classic fairy tale of Beauty and the Beast for a modern audience. While most fall into obscurity, I believe that Belle is a solid attempt. Belle is the anime version that tells the story in a Ready Player One-like future. In this version, there is a game everyone plays that allows you to log into a virtual world. Suzu is a grieving teen who has lost her mother and is floating through life, trying to find her place in it. She plays the game and becomes the worldwide pop sensation Belle. The rest of the movie is a retelling of Beauty in the beast in a virtual world.

As far as remakes go, this is a sold one. It is far better than the monstrosity that was Beastly, and I even dare say it is better than Disney’s own live-action. The art is pretty, although some of the animation is awkward, and the voice acting is amazing. I did watch it in the original Japanese with subtitles, but there is an English dubbing available if you don’t want to read. I can’t speak on how good the voice acting is for the dubbed version. 

Belle is a movie that focuses more on being a slice-of-life anime. Instead of focussing on the bizarre and magical, a lot of the focus falls on the mundane and serene. Scenes will let you admire the scenery surrounding the sleepy town in japan rather than magical transformations. As a result, you get a lot of scenes that pan over rivers or skylines while Suzu deals with the newfound pressures of being popular. There is a lot of beautiful art in this movie that should not be slept on. 

This is not your typical action-packed anime. While there is fighting and action, the story focuses more on dealing with grief, loss, and abuse. 

The story handles each topic appropriately while telling a decent story. What I liked the most about this version is how active Suzu is in the narrative. Most of the time, this story paints Belle as the smart woman who must save the beast because she has no other option. She is sold or trapped into a situation where she learns sympathy out of necessity. In Belle, Suzu chooses to log into the game as a way to escape and likes being someone different. It helps her cope with a lot of her pent-up feelings. She doesn’t have to help the beast but chooses to on her own. Although Suzu’s motivations for helping the beast are unclear, she drives her own narrative. I love Suzu as a protagonist, and while some of this story is cheesy, it never got unbearable. 

I liked this movie, but I love a slice-of-life anime. If you like this art style and genre, this is a solid pick. Otherwise, this movie might be a bit too slow and uneventful. 

Movie Review: The Outfit (2022)

The Outfit is an interesting twist on the gangster genre that I enjoyed thoroughly. While the run time is a little longer than my attention span can handle, I found little issue sitting through this movie. Mark Rylance gives a magnificent performance, and he deserves your attention. It is hard to write this review because I don’t want to spoil anything. The narrative’s effectiveness hinges on its mystery, and who am I to spoil that for you? Please take my word for it, you need to watch this movie.

The Outfit is about a cutter who owns a shop in Chicago whose primary clientele consists of a local Irish gang. The events focus on a very eventful night with a city on the verge of gang warfare. The entire movie takes place inside the shop, but the narrative is not confined within its walls. Instead, there will be bits of dialogue, subtle gestures, and even accents that add to its grandeur. The movie is mostly dialogue, but it is in the details where the weight of the narrative lies. My suggestion to you, pay attention to everything. It will be your job to piece together the narrative through its various clues as it builds up to a pretty satisfying ending.

I am afraid this is all I can say about this film without ruining the experience. I suggest you go into this movie as blind as possible because the experience relies heavily on piecing the story together. This is a great gangster movie and well worth your time, just make sure you have time for it. It is a long one. You can watch this movie on Peacock.

Movie Review: The Longshots (2008)

The Longshots is another sports movie. While it isn’t bad, if you’ve seen one sports movie, you’ve seen them all. Jasmine becomes the school’s first female quarterback and the team goes from the worst in the league to the best. If you have time to kill, or like sports movie, it isn’t a complete waste of time. Otherwise, there isn’t anything special or memorable about this movie. It follows the same story beats and hits all the mandatory emotional components. You won’t hate this movie, but you also won’t remember watching it.

What sets this movie apart from others in the genre is Ice Cube. Ice Cube is one of those few actors that plays the same character in every movie he plays. While his range is very limited by his ability, I appreciate that he helps tell the stories of an underrepresented people. While some of his movies have become culturally important, this is not one of them. At the end of the day, this is another sports movie, and it gets as cheesy as you can imagine.  

You can watch this movie for free on YouTube. You can do a lot worse for free, trust me.  

Movie Review: Miss Potter (2016)

I have never been a fan of biopics, but I’ve been coming around lately. It is safe to assume that maybe it isn’t that I don’t like biopics, but rather that I have never seen any good ones. I believe that Miss Potter is one of the good ones.  

Miss Potter is the dramatization of the life of children’s book author Beatrix Potter. This is an elegantly quirky retelling of the life of a very inspiring woman. It deals with love, loss, and challenging oppressive gender roles. It is well acted, beautifully directed, and very compelling. If you have time on your hands, you should at the very least consider watching this movie.  

I don’t know how historically accurate this film is. I will instead treat this like any other narrative I come across. I thought the characters were perfect. Miss Potter is quirky, strong willed, and very imaginative. I admire the amount of effort she put forth to get her work published considering the challenges she faced due to her sex. It amazes me how much she was able to do in a time when women were under constant pressures to be submissive. It scares me that so many years later, these pressures still exist, even though they might have evolved a bit. It is infuriating to know that the rights and privileges of women are governed by the ego of a few fragile and greedy men. As a society, we must continue to fight and persevere as Miss Potter did. Society will never be perfect, but we can’t keep going backwards.  

Anyways, you can find this movie free on YouTube!  

Movie Review: Here After (2020)

I had to think hard about whether or not I liked this movie. While it does have its moments, they are overshadowed by this movie’s lazy writing. Here After is one of the laziest romantic comedies I have ever seen. 

Here After is about a romance between a ghost and a living woman. The movie deals with relationships, love, and the afterlife, but it does so ineffectively. It gets incredibly hard to watch with how hard it tries to be a sappy love story.

A lot of the narrative exists within pretentious conversations about life, death, and love. While there are some quirky and fun scenes, the whole movie doesn’t carry this energy. Instead, it becomes another generic and predictable love story. Its desperate attempts to be different sadly cannot hide the fact that this love story has been told better elsewhere.

Micheal and Honey Bee fall in love, but can’t be together. Obviously, this movie will build up a romantic journey just to have Honey Bee die at the end. They have to end up together forever somehow. What makes this movie incredibly lazy is that the only reason that the two can interact is that Honey Bee is also conveniently dying. It’s hard to believe that in New York City, these two can find each other by chance.

My biggest problem with this movie is the inconsistency of the rules for the afterlife. These rules seem to change to fit the narrative or are overlooked by its bad writing. The movie sets up that people cannot die alone. Instead, those who die alone must find a soul mate before they can cross over. Cross over to what? The movie doesn’t specify.

So what are the rules? A soul mate is strictly a romantic partner. What happens to asexual people? Narcissists? What happens if I die and I become best friends with someone? Can we cross over as bros? I love my wife. She is my soulmate. If I die before her, do I automatically pass over? What if she remarries? Do I get yanked out of the other side, forced to seek out a new soul mate?

When a person becomes a ghost, he is removed from all his distracting feelings. These change depending on what the story needs to be, but lust seems to be constant. A ghost whose mind isn’t clouded by a desire for sex is free to find his true love. There are lines of dialogue that contradict this, but no one’s paying that close attention. The ghosts still roam the Earth, but can’t touch or affect the physical world or living people. Unless of course, it is alcohol, glasses containing alcohol, books, and your true love. Like everything, this will change if the plot needs to move forward or there needs to be a cheap laugh.

I am clearly overanalyzing a movie that doesn’t deserve it. I can’t recommend this movie. It is pretentious, lazy, and inconsistent. Even if you like these kinds of movies, I don’t find this love story to be all that inspiring. Micheal has to be reprogrammed in order to find Honey Bee, what happens when he gets those feelings back? Anyways, you can find this movie on YouTube for free. Oh and if you are watching this for Christina Ricci, she is barely in the movie. 

Movie Review: Apartment 1303 (2012)

You can watch Apartment 1303 for free on YouTube, but I wouldn’t bother. The acting is terrible, the sound is bad, and the story isn’t interesting. The movie focuses on two sisters who move into apartment 1303 to get away from a drunk and abusive mother. They live in this apartment at different times, but both will experience the ominous presence of the ghosts that live there. It makes me wonder how this complex exists when half the residents are ghosts. 

Apartment 1303 fails as a horror movie in every regard. The poor acting and lack of any emotion kill any suspense this poorly written movie could have had. Its garbage sound mixing means you hear every breath and rustling in the background, and it gets distracting. The soundtrack is played on a speaker one room over, and once from a pair of wireless headphones. The plot is full of holes and continuity errors. There are lines of dialogue that contradict themselves in the same breath. This movie is lazy, boring, and a huge waste of time.

I do, however, want to take a moment to overanalyze the plot a bit. Usually, in horror movies, a character will make frustratingly incompetent choices that lead to their demise, like staying in an apartment everyone says is haunted. In this movie, I don’t blame the characters for not leaving the apartment. Apartment 1303 is a one-bedroom high-rise apartment in downtown Detroit that is definitely nicer and bigger than the one I am currently living in. The rent was only $700 a month with a full kitchen, a large living room, a full-sized bathtub, and a balcony with a nice view of the lake. I could put aside my fear of ghosts for $700 of rent. The sisters were also escaping an abusive mother who was desperately clinging to her failed career as a singer. I would choose the ghost too, especially after hearing her music. This movie is dumb, but living in the haunted apartment is blameless.

Anyways, this movie is free on YouTube, but I wouldn’t bother.